Lost In You
by LaylaBinx
Summary: Esca is a virgin, Marcus is not. First time, sexytimes fluff! SLASH! :D


**Hello all! So this is like my second time writing a full on sex scene so if its a bit wonky I sincerely apologize! O.o Hope you all like it! :D**

* * *

Marcus sighed wearily, his shoulders slumping a bit as the evening continued to stretch on past what he deemed bearable. His companions at the table didn't seem to mind or be aware of his plight, laughing and telling stories and drinking heavily; the last choice was by far the most popular for the evening.

It hadn't been his idea to come to here, to go on yet another excursion so soon after they'd returned. However, considering his recent success in finding the Eagle, he hadn't had more than a few hours to himself before his presence was requested elsewhere. Many wanted to congratulate him, some just wanted to see him for themselves to meet the man who brought back glory to the Roman Empire. It had been exhilerating at first, now it was just tiresome.

A loud bark of laughter from his host shook him from his thoughts. He startled a bit, the sudden movement causing his injured leg to seize up for a second. He hid the wince and reached beneath the table, making a fist with one hand and digging it into the coiled muscles.

"So, as I was saying, the hills were quite literally crawling with soldiers, a couple thousand against my men and me-" Claudius rambled on, making large sweeping motions with his hands and sloshing wine out of his cup onto the floor. No one seemed to notice other than the slaves tending to the party who came forward to clean up the mess.

Marcus resisted the urge to roll his eyes as Claudius rambled on with his story. He had met him before and the surge of irritation he felt for the man never managed to leave. He was cocky, rude, and overly obsessed with himself: everything a Roman soldier was trained to be but when it came to Claudius, that self-importance just made him more unlikeable. He'd experienced many victories and deserved the credit but it made him less tolerable to be around as well. Still, he owed it to his uncle, who had set up this meeting, to appear and pretend he was having a good time. If he'd had it his way, Marcus would rather clean horse stables for a year than sit at this table.

He glanced behind him, catching a glimpse of Esca standing against the wall a few feet back from him. The younger man was nearly hidden in the shadows, his arms crossed over his chest and his back pressed flush against the wall. Even though he was considered a freedman now, he still refused to sit at a Roman table and engage in the conversation. Marcus was one of the few Romans he actually tolerated, possibly even liked, and he was perfectly comfortable letting others know that. He caught Marcus looking at him and gave him the barest hint of a smile, invisible to anyone else who wasn't accustomed to his actions.

Marcus felt himself smile in return. They'd grown closer over the past few months and it had nothing to do with their victory with the Eagle. They understood one another better, had a greater respect for the other, and the bond was slowly but surely solidifying. Marcus had asked him to accompany him to this wretched gathering for the sole purpose of having some time alone with him. Neither of them had gotten so much as a day to themselves since they'd returned. It would be nice to spend a few nights away in one another's company.

"Ah, Marcus!" Claudius said suddenly, once again tearing him out of his thoughts. Marcus turned to look at him, a carefully molded expression resting on his face. He offered a content smile that felt entirely too forced and allowed his attention to be taken by the other man.

"Why does your companion distance himself from our table? He is welcome here, even though he's a Briton!" Claudius grinned as the other members of the table chuckled and agreed. "Any friend of yours is welcome in my home, no matter what part of the country they've stumbled they're way from!" More laughter echoed around him and Marcus felt his fists clench beneath the table. Suddenly, there was a seriousness that passed over Claudius' face. "Or does he think he's above our congregation?"

Marcus was always amazed at how tightly Esca could contain his composure. His expression remained perfectly neutral and he never even attempted to say anything in his defense. It wasn't that he expected Marcus to defend him, he just saw no reason to respond to someone who wasn't worth the effort of his words. Marcus, however, chose to answer for him. "I assure you, Claudius, that is not the case. Esca simply has different customs than you are all used to. His distance means no disrespect."

It meant a world of disrespect and Marcus knew it; hell, he would be over there with him in an instant if he could. Esca had sensed his friend's discomfort upon coming here and made it perfectly clear to everyone around them that he wasn't happy to be here either. Not sitting at Claudius' table would show and act of defiance and disrespect that the other man was not used to and that's exactly what Esca had counted on.

Claudius seemed oblivious to that fact and let out another bark of laughter. "You seem to know a great deal about him, Marcus."

Marcus frowned a bit, not liking the tone Claudius' voice had taken on. "Yes," he answered carefully, trying to keep his expression as neutral as Esca's had been. "Our travels together allowed us to become quite good friends so its only natural that I know him better than most."

Claudius smiled conspiratorially. "And how well might that be?"

Judging from his implications and the way he spoke, Marcus was pretty well aware of where this conversation was going. He grabbed his wine and forced it to his lips to prevent anyone from seeing his teeth clenched.

"Have you shared your bed with him?"

Even though he'd been trying to mentally prepare himself for the question, it still caught him off guard. Marcus choked on his wine, coughing into the back of his hand. "What?"

Claudius grinned at him and shot a look to Esca. "Oh come now, Marcus. Your journey was long, surely you must have slept with him at least once." The other members of the table nodded in agreement, casting curious looks to Marcus and his continuously silent companion.

Marcus caught a glimpse of Esca from the corner of his eye and was surprised by the younger man's startled expression. His eyes had widened and his face had taken on a peculiar crimson color. "Claudius," Marcus said, trying to keep his voice even. "I hardly think-"

Claudius laughed and cut him off. "So its true! I wonder if your uncle knew it would lead to this when he purchased him." The man sitting next to him chuckled causing Claudius to continue. "There's no shame in it! I have several slaves whose sole purpose is to keep me company at night! Women are good to have on the arm for events but sometimes the bedroom calls for less fragile creatures, someone who can stand a bit of rough treatment!" Another bout of laughter echoed around the table and Marcus felt his face grow hot.

"So tell me," Claudius said, leaning forward and casting a glance between Marcus and Esca (who no longer maintained the composed expression he'd started with; now he just looked stunned and embarrassed). "What was it like sleeping with a Briton? I've heard they're savages on the battlefield, was it the same in bed? Did the reputation hold true?"

For a moment, Marcus had no idea what to say. He was the center of attention once more and it was certainly not welcome this time. He was angry and embarassed at having his personal life scrutinized so thoroughly and having Esca be brought down with it.

There was a sound behind him and he looked to see Esca turn abruptly and leave the room. Marcus felt a growl build deep in his throat and his fists clenched beneath the table once more.

"Oh my, it appears I've upset your companion." Claudius said though he didn't look the least bit affected by it. "Perhaps he's unaccustomed to our Roman sense of humor." More laughter surrounded him and Marcus was on his feet before he could stop himself.

"Your "sense of humor", Claudius, is disgusting and I think I would rather run myself through with my own sword than have to put up with it for a second longer. My personal affairs are none of your concern and certainly do not need to be discussed in front of others. Esca is one of the bravest men I've ever known, Briton or not, and I would rather have only him on my side than ten thousand of your best men. His company means more to me than the Eagle and all of the Roman Empire. Thank you for inviting us here but your invitations will go unnoticed from now on. Your company is not one that I wish to keep." And with that, Marcus turned and walked out the way Esca had gone, leaving a very stunned and silent Claudius and the remaining occupants of the table in his wake.

**OOOOO**

The evening was warm and pleasant, a gentle breeze rolling across the lake sitting in front of the house. Marcus didn't have time to revel in the pleasantries though, he needed to find Esca. He was walking faster than his leg appreciated, the muscles cramping and spasming with each step, but he ignored it. His anger helped to drown out the pain.

He rounded a corner and stopped, his eyes falling on a solitary figure standing near the edge of the lake. He wanted to sigh in relief at having found Esca so quickly but he knew that there was nothing to be relieved about just yet. Straightening his shoulders, he took a few hesitant steps forward, carefully approaching his friend.

Esca didn't turn to acknowledge him but he knew he was there. "You should go back inside, Marcus." He said, his voice sharp in the silence of the night. The moon was large and full overhead, casting silver shadows over his skin and making him look almost ethereal. Even if he wanted to, Marcus knew he wouldn't be able to tear himself away.

"I think I've had quite enough of their company for one lifetime." Marcus said, coming up to stand beside his friend. Esca said nothing, continuing to stare out across the placid waters. "I'm sorry if he offended you."

The younger man bristled ever so slightly, his shoulders tensing. "That man is a pig." He said finally, his voice filled with loathing and bitterness. "He should be ashamed of himself."

Marcus nodded, shifting his weight onto his uninjured leg. "I agree; I let him know as such as well." He tried for a smile but Esca's expression remained blank.

There was a tense silence between them, one that had nearly disappeared over their months together. It made Marcus uncomfortable. "Gah!" Esca muttered finally, startling him a bit. "What is it with you Romans and your obsession with sex?"

Marcus frowned, suddenly confused. "Its not an obsession-"

"Yes it is!" Esca exclaimed, cutting him off just as quickly. "Ever since I was brought to this wretched place the only thing people seem to be concerned with is sex and how much someone has had and how often! Its disgusting! I was nearly sold as a sex slave and the only reason I wasn't was because they discovered I was a well trained fighter."

The older man frowned again; he'd never realized Esca had almost been sold off as a sex slave. It was a potential fate for all those taken into slavery but it was much different to hear him say it. "Esca-"

"My people took such things seriously." Esca continued, casting a glance at Marcus before returning his gaze to the lake. "Sex was reserved for one person and in the privacy of one's home. There was respect and honor and nothing like this!" He hissed the last part, flicking one hand out irritably.

Marcus sighed; he wanted to make Esca understand that not everyone was like that, that he wasn't like that, but in his anger he'd gone back to blaming all of Rome and her inhabitants. "Esca, not all Romans are as brash and insensitive as Claudius and the others you've had the displeasure of being around...there are plenty of people who prefer one partner and only one. Just like anyone you've shared your bed with, their partner is honored and treated with respect."

At this, Esca stiffened again, the muscles in his back going rigid. Marcus frowned once more and looked at him. "Are you alright?"

The younger man didn't answer for a moment, his face turning a pale pink color in the moonlight. "I've never shared my bed with anyone." He said finally, his words soft and almost lost in the stillness.

"What?" Marcus couldn't keep the surprise out of his voice.

"I've never shared my bed with anyone." Esca repeated, looking at him from the corner of his eye. "I've never been with anyone." The admission seemed to make him uncomfortable; he shifted his weight slightly, balancing on one foot and then switching it to the other.

Marcus was stunned. He was well aware that he hadn't done anything with Esca other than kiss but it was just surprising to think that he hadn't been with anyone ever. It was nearly unheard of in Rome to have never had sex at their age unless that person was a member of the church and even that was subject to change. "You mean...you're a virgin?"

Esca didn't say anything but the growing pink color in his cheeks was answer enough.

Marcus wasn't sure why that made him so happy. Maybe it was because he knew that Esca had never been forced into sex like some slaves were or maybe it was because it meant that for all his strength and stubbornness, he was still vulnerable and unsure in that aspect. The older man couldn't stop himself from grinning like a fool.

Esca's eyes widened suddenly as he took in the other man's expression. "This amuses you?" He asked, his voice clipped with indignation. He turned suddenly, fully prepared to stalk off and leave the idiot soldier where he stood, but a large hand caught his arm and pulled him back. "Let go." He muttered dangerously, refusing to meet the Centurion's eye.

"No." Marcus said quietly, his grip remaining vice-like on the smaller man.

"Marcus-!" Esca started to shout but was cut off when his mouth was covered by another. He felt his whole body still, his mind temporarily shutting itself off as he leaned into it. They'd kissed before, several times in fact, but Marcus had never pressured him to do anything more. He had never asked him or forced himself upon him and that alone was enough to keep him from lashing out at him now.

Finally, Marcus pulled back, still smiling, and looked at him. "I'm not smiling to tease you." He said honestly, cupping Esca's face in one hand. "I'm smiling because no one else has touched you."

Esca scowled, trying half-heartedly to break free from Marcus's grip. "My virtue is not some prize to be won, nor is it something I'm just going to throw away like garbage." He muttered, his voice still as sharp and scathing as it had always been when he had first met Marcus. Now though he could hear the faltering in his words.

Marcus just smiled at him, keeping on hand cupped against his face. "I know." He said softly, leaning forward and pressing his forehead against the younger man's. "Which is why I won't ever do anything without your consent." He smiled again, brushing his thumb over Esca's cheekbone before kissing him again softly. He pulled away, letting the younger man go, and took a step back. "I'll see you inside." He said softly before turning around and walking back to the house, leaving Esca standing motionless in the moonlight.

**OOOOO**

It was late when Esca finally came into the room, the door creaking quietly as he entered. Claudius and his group were still in the dining hall but much of their loud, boisterous noise had quieted down as the evening wore on. Marcus was still awake, listening carefully for any sign of his companion. He heard the door creak open softly and a few seconds later, a familiar weight settled behind him, a body pressing flush against his back. He felt his breath catch in his throat.

There was a brief silence filled with only the sounds of their breathing. Esca snaked one hand over the older man's side and caught his hand. "Marcus." He breathed, his words coming out like a prayer. "Would you be with me?" His voice sounded so unsure, so childlike, that Marcus had the urge to grin again. Instead, he turned toward him and gathered him in his arms.

He always forgot how much smaller Esca was than him and how easy it was to wrap his arms completely around his lithe form. He held him close, breathing in the scent of his skin. "Of course I will." He leaned down, brushing his lips against the younger man's and capturing them in a kiss.

Esca reciprocated fully, catching his bottom lip between his teeth and deepening the kiss. His hands wandered up the length of the Centurion's spine, fingers brushing over thick, corded muscle and old battle scars. He memorized the feeling of his skin against his hands, taking note of all the perfect imperfections and reveling in the smoothness of his skin.

Marcus groaned into the kiss, rolling over until Esca was on his back beneath him, stormy eyes gazing up at him expectantly. "Are you sure you want this?" He asked, breaking the kiss for just long enough to get an answer.

The younger man nodded, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "I want you." He said, the words sending a shockwave all the way down to Marcus's groin. "Just you."

That was all the invitation he needed. He kissed him more desperately, his hands moving with a life of their own and traveling down Esca's chest and stomach, coming to rest against the erection that was pressing fervently into his hip. Esca made a tiny noise in the back of his throat, his back arching as Marcus's hand wrapped around him, the touch warm and exhilarating. He gasped again, writhing beneath the older man's hands and closing his eyes.

Marcus smiled in the darkness, kissing the sensitive skin of Esca's neck and taking pride in the fact that Esca was whispering his name. He could feel Esca's pulse against his teeth, the rush of blood that quickened as he nipped at bit at the skin on his throat. He trailed down his chest, lips and tongue brushing over his nipples as he continued. He could smell the sweat on Esca's skin, that earthy, slightly metallic scent that he knew so well. It was driving him wild.

The younger man arched beneath him, pressing his body more firmly into Marcus's and lifting his hips to get more leverage. "Marcus..." He breathed, pressing into him once more. "Do it."

The Centurion hesitated for only a second before removing his hand from Esca's member and dipping it in between his legs. He looked at him, taking in the trust and desire in the younger man's eyes and kissed him again roughly before inserting two fingers.

Esca gasped sharply, fingers digging into his shoulders and nearly biting down on his tongue but Marcus kept the pressure steady and waited for him to relax. After a few seconds, Esca's fingers released their death grip on his shoulders and he took a deep breath.

"Are you ready?" Marcus asked, kissing him firmly, hard enough to leave a bruise. Esca nodded, kissing back with just as much fervor. Marcus nodded in return, flipping him over onto his stomach and keeping one hand planted in the small of Esca's back. With his free hand, he grabbed a bottle of oil that had been sitting nearby, dispensing a small amount into his hand before working it onto himself. He got onto his knees, pulling Esca up with him, and pushed in slowly.

The younger man groaned deeply in the back of his throat, his hands tangled in the bedding beneath them. It hurt more than he thought it would but the pain was equally wonderful at the same time. It took his breath away for a second, making him feel dizzy and light-headed.

"Are you alright?" Marcus asked from behind him, his voice rough and thick with desire.

Esca managed a nod and took a deep breath, steadying himself on his knees. Marcus pushed into carefully, tentative at the prospect of hurting him. After a few seconds, the rhythm became more even, slow and deep and wonderful. Esca gasped again, this time out of pleasure. It was like being struck by lightning, every sense had come alive and his nerves felt like they were on fire.

The thrusting became faster suddenly and he could feel liquid heat pooling in his stomach. His fingers curled into fists, his body shuddered, and he let out a shaky breath as he climaxed. Marcus tensed behind him a second later, his hand clamping painfully into Esca's back for just an instant before he finished as well.

Marcus pulled away from him carefully, snaking an arm around his waist and pulling Esca down with him. They were both breathing hard, sweating, and completely satisfied. He held the younger man close, feeling his heart pounding quickly against his hand, and buried his face in the back of his neck. He took a deep breath, savoring the scent of the man he loved. Esca smelled like trees and wind and everything wild and Marcus couldn't get enough of it.

After a few minutes, it was Esca who broke the silence. "I'm glad it was you."

Marcus smiled into his shoulder and pulled him a bit closer. "Always." Esca chuckled softly in front of him, snuggling a little deep into his chest and letting out a soft, contented sigh. Marcus felt his eyes close, his body feeling heavy and weighted, and let himself begin to drift off to sleep. This was all he'd ever hoped for, all he'd ever needed. It was certain: if he could have Esca to share his bed with him for the rest of his life, he would be the happiest man in the world.

* * *

**I'm all embarrassed now...its awkward to write smexy scenes! Hope you guys enjoyed it though! :D**


End file.
